My Moments of Insanity

[Shadow Hiwatari]

Why do people say
"Oh i don't care for whatever happen to anyone or anything"
Like there hard and careless,
But when the time comes for someone close to part of this world everything they said was a lie,
they start to cry,
they start to weep,
they can't even Control what they still seek
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lately,
i can't control myself

Maybe,
i'm going insane

Trust my inner self

Trust it's Illusions

Told you,
i can't control me

don't go through,
the way to get me

back to my insanity

just as i fall apart
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i can't control this thing inside of me
It's diving me to insanity
The only thing to safe to do
is lock myself up in solotude

I've rip out my heart
which is the most important part
i've locked up my emotions
so they never can stop my consciounce
i've torn all sanity
Away from me!!!!

i hold up a mask
which holds my former self
which you all used to know me for
but not anymore!!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Whats the point of emotions?, they only get in your way of pure thinking and clarity of life,
Emotions are what hold you back from fighting when scared,
Emotions hold you back when Surviving, when trying to end things
Emotions get in the way when trying to think for yourself, when thinking of other feelings
Emotions are the only thing that get in the way, not other people in life
As for there to be no emotion there would be no need to hold back at everything you do
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Why do i still have feelings for you, when i gave up love long ago
Why do i still care for you, when i am not trying to
Why does my body move to protect you, when i'm trying to get away from you
Why do i love you, when i have already become Damaged because of love
Why do i still presist for you to acknoledge me, when i try so hard to avoid
Why do i have feelings for you, when.... i already disposed of them....
long ago along with you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Why is it everytime i destroy my heart somehow it is fixed,
Why is it when i lose love, love finds it's way back to me
Why everytime i think of you, my heart becomes painful
Then thats when i remembered, i gave my heart to you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I wish you would just drop dead,
It would be better then me punching your head
Though i hate my father i know why he left you
Because he couldn't stand you, just like me too
Your my mother, yet you drive me insane
In my whole life you have been the pain
I can't wait till you die,
Because then i will not have to lie.
I don't have to hold it in anymore
Then i can say anything i want and just be me
As soon as you die i can then become free